"I am a Danfo Driver, Suo!"

Photo taken from http://logorofafrica.tumblr.com/

     I've only ever been in a "Danfo" twice in my life.. well in Lagos obviously. I've been on plenty of buses, and all experiences have been quite awkward. Even in airport transporters I'm awkward, because I don't speak unless I'm spoken to. I'm not a very social person, so being in one of the most social cities in Nigeria made me shrink more than ever. Both experiences I've had were with my aunt. I love going to the market so much, so when my aunt was going to the market to get meat for her birthday party I volunteered to accompany her. We took an okada to the market and trekked the rest of the way. After getting the things she needed we had to catch a bus to a place nearby, but not too close to walk to, where okada men were posted waiting for passengers. Did I mention that I had to run across two busy roads and hop a road divider? Yes. Anyhow, once on the bus my aunt and I were separated... this being one of my first few times in Lagos, and also the first time getting on a bus in Lagos, I got scared. My aunt knew that (she knows me well), so she just told me "It's okay. I'm right behind you." The whole ride I wasn't worried about missing a stop, or the lady next to me having her load settled on my body. I was worried that my aunt would somehow leave me, lol, even though I knew she would never do such a thing. When it was about time to get off she whispered in my ear "We'll get off at the next stop.", we got to the next stop and we both hopped out. All I could think about was how every person I looked at began staring at me, and how much I wanted to get back home!
     I'm not a look-you-in-the-eye type of person when out in public, but in Lagos you could really up your practice for staring contests. Lagosians are welcoming people, but boy do they stare. I love it. Every time we enter the city traffic going home from the airport I involuntarily take part in maybe 5 staring contests. Whether it's people selling market in the middle of go slow, people driving struggling beside you, or okada rider & passenger, you are sure to catch someone's eye.

*Quick Story: Two years ago, while on the side of the road my aunt joked around and said she would sell my brother to the mechanic, and make good money off of him because of his light complexion. lol He tried to laugh/brush it off, but I could tell that he was a little worried. haha After she said that an okada man and his passenger were coming down the road and as they passed their eyes were locked on my brother from beginning to end.

     Anyways, being in a Danfo isn't exactly fun for me, or anybody I don't think. You get cramped 4 or 5 to a seat, and people's loads are settling onto your body, but what can one do? Trekking in the hot sun is not always bearable, especially for long distances. For me, I prefer okadas to the bus (even though the risk is 10x), but I feel free on an okada. The wind just dey do me somehow, and I love how the scenery flashes by. What can I say?

Introduction: Home.

     I'm not one to come up with a creative introduction, but I could draw up anything you'd like.. weird abi? I know. I'm an uninspired creative being. Let's start there! Yes, I am an "uninspired creative being". I go by the name of Michelle (or Ifechukwude, depending on who I am talking to), and I am a 17-year-old Nigerian-American currently suffering from homesickness for a place that is technically my home. 

     What I mean is, I live in the US of A, but I am Nigerian, therefore making me Nigerian-American. I am by default supposed to call America my "home", but by blood Nigeria, Mother Africa!, is my Home. I have started a checklist based mission to find my way back Home for good. Some items you find here that resemble the treasures back Home do not contain the same sweetness or value as they should. I hate how I can't enjoy Nigerian delicacies like they should be enjoyed, watch my favorite Nigerian actor/actresses/musicians/tv personnels by the press of a button, walk down the street to my aunt's house or to my favorite market, or even enjoy my favorite songs as I drive down the roads of Lagos whenever I want. It's either a every summer fling, or every other summer thing. Vacation. We go for vacation, because we're told that it's not as easy as it seems when we visit, so vacation is the max. stay for us. For me, internet o, light o, traffic o, water ... okay maybe I really need water.. but those are things we struggle with here in the States as well. The internet does crash, black outs do happen, and people get into accidents every day. We've even had our own share of water shortages. Yep, water shortages in America, "The Land of the Free, and the Home of the Brave". Brave ke? Free ni? Abegi! Courtesy is a two-way street and I feel like people are putting their head to make one-way. With everything that has been happening I just feel like American and I need a break in our relationship.. I think we need to see other people. 

     I haven't always felt this way though. I used to root for America with every power wey I get for body, but the spirit started to fade, and I stopped comparing things I saw in Nigeria to the things I had in America. I went from "Abuja looks just like America!" to "America no dey sweet for body like Naija." I no longer felt at home. I became a stranger to the land I was introduced to. As I matured, I began to see the hatred for People of Color (POC). Racism. Racism was something I had never encountered upon the 8 vacations I took to Nigeria. That was a major factor for me. For me being a POC and having foreign roots in a country full of people who didn't even fully welcome their own scared me. Some time had passed, through the darkness, I managed find a light, Ekò. I always got excited when being at the airport, knowing I was leaving and going on a new adventure. I remember being younger, getting to Germany with my mother and brother, and having to carry my brother's backpack plus my own. I remember being in so much pain, but not caring because all I could think about was getting to Lagos. Of course I cried every time I left, thinking about all the things and places and people I didn't get to see, not sure if I would ever be able to come back again. I was only concerned about having fun. Now that I'm a couple months shy of 18, all I can think about is Ain't no party like a Lagos party, 'cause when Lagos party we don't bother nobody haha. I was to enjoy the Las Gidi life mann. I want to go to clubs, parties, weddings.. everything! I don't want to live here for the rest of my life. Chu? Make I get my own share of Lagos life jare! I want to explore, and meet new people. I want to be inspired, and get out of my comfort zone. I want to see a new light. I want to feel new things. I want to create. All these wants from..